Once again, I received another rejection from a publisher that I really admired and my heart was broken. I know you’re not supposed to put all of your eggs in one basket, but I did. I really wanted this golden egg. I now I know why you don’t lust over one egg – when you do, you’re liable to have a huge egg of disappointment splattered on your face. I’m still brushing off the egg. I had family and friends who tried to help me by telling me I was a good writer and my mom, even took me out for a pedicure and lunch, but I was wallowing in despair.
It would be one thing to dive into a pity party with just one rejection, but this was not the first one. No, this was one of many. True, I had re-written and gotten this manuscript edited with Lori Wilde, my guru, and this was only second rejection of this version – there are numerous versions, but I thought this one I had finally gotten it right with Lori’s help and my wonderful critique partner, Jessica Aspen.
But I was wrong. The rejections keep coming and my ego was being chiseled away by an ice pick. I wanted to give up writing and turn my back. I was one of those many people who think they could write, but were deluding themselves. I went to my idols of idols – Sherrilyn Kenyon.
No, I didn’t email her. We only met once at Colorado Romance Writer’s conference and she signed my favorite book – Acheron – and it was wonderful to speak to her. I was only one of many faces to her, but each time, I walk through the tunnel of despair and I feel the fog of doubts circling me, I return to her website and read her journey. Each time, it gives me hope. I may never be another Sherrilyn Kenyon and I may never meet her again, but she has reached out her hand, many of times, and pulled me out of the dark tunnel. Thank you, Sherrilyn, for giving us hope that still walk in the darkness. Thanks for being the light.